Recently, I finished watching "Sex and the City"—the series, the movies, the whole thing. And although it might sound trivial, I wanted to bring this up today since I think we can get some good reflections from it.

I started watching "Sex and the City" mainly because of its cultural impact, but with the mindset that I'd probably find it outdated and sexist. And although Carrie's character might seem a bit outdated at times, I was pleasantly surprised by how current the show can be. It addresses issues of youth in the big city that are not only relevant but resonate deeply with me.

"Sex and the City" was a breath of fresh air for me when it comes to my perception of aging, ageism, and the idea that we have to be in a certain place at a certain stage of our lives. I can only imagine how groundbreaking it was twenty years ago to see a TV show that states it is totally okay and normal for a woman to be 35 and single, or without children. Even today, twenty years later, we still feel the constant pressure of society, family, and friends all starting to get engaged and create families while we are basically making do with rent and saving for our BRAT summer.

Secondly, let's talk about singleness.

I am the single one in basically all my friend groups. In every circle—in Milan, in Brazil, in Australia, and around the world—I've always been the single one. I have friends in long-term relationships, friends who have had a few relationships, and even friends who are in a single phase of their lives, but I am the one who's always been the single one. And although I am super happy with my life, this position obviously comes with questions like "Maybe the problem is me?", "Should I settle to find someone?", and "Why not me?".

The most important lesson of "Sex and the City," or at least the one that stayed with me the most, is accepting that life might not be about finding your soulmate.

• People might disagree with me since the whole show is based on Carrie trying to find a man and their main conversation is 80% about boys. However, if you look deeper, time and time again they declare that maybe the love they need is the love of their friends and not a romantic one, or that even if it doesn't happen, they wouldn't be less complete for that. Especially when you look at Samantha, who is the sex symbol and feminist of the group, stating time and time again that her goal is not to get married. Her story is her own and not the story of a couple who just happen to be single until they find each other. 

For me, it was so important to have the representation and reaffirmation that my life is 100% complete without anyone. Which is something that I might know in theory, but is not so well represented out there.

"Sex and the City" initiated a conversation a long time ago that we are still debating nowadays. That maybe we should start considering happiness beyond the default mode on societal manual guide of how to live, marry, and find a family before it's too late.

With love,

Micael.

P.S: Should I start a sex column like Carrie? Would you guys read it?