Hi there,

It’s been a while since my last time here—last time, I stepped aside to let Enzo share a bit about his book and the writing process. Did you guys like it? If so, we can definitely do more things like that.

Today, I want to talk about patience and process —something I don’t usually have much of, and, honestly, something I feel like fewer and fewer people do as time goes on.

Right now, I’m in a phase of my life where I’m planting a lot of seeds but harvesting very few. And that requires patience. The thing is, these days, we’ve shortened the time we take to process things—any and all things.

Lacan described a logical time for processing experiences, breaking it down into three stages:

• The time to see – the immediate observation of an event; it happens in the moment, without much reflection.

• The time to understand – the process of elaboration, where we not only reflect on our own perspective but also consider others’ viewpoints and the broader context of the world around us. This is where true understanding begins.

• The time to conclude – the final stage, where we reach a conclusion (right or wrong) based on our observations and reflections.

In other words, before we can truly understand something, we need time to process it. Only then can we reach a meaningful conclusion. Grief, for example, is nothing more than a process of elaboration.

But in today’s hyper-connected, fast-paced world, we’re bombarded with constant stimuli. We observe too many things at once, never giving ourselves the space to properly process them. We have tools to speed up every possible process, making us less patient when it comes to thinking things through—from the smallest daily annoyances to the biggest life decisions. We’ve become so accustomed to instant gratification that we struggle with anything that takes longer than a click.

• I recently caught myself getting impatient over a YouTube ad. And then I remembered that not long ago, streaming platforms didn’t even exist—we all just accepted commercials on TV. Sure, they were annoying, but we waited.

A few years ago, we allowed ourselves to feel boredom. We knew how to wait. And here’s the thing: It’s in the waiting—in those moments of stillness, of patience—that real processing happens.

How often do you find yourself jumping straight from observation to conclusion?

That can be dangerous in a lot of ways:

• Anxiety levels are skyrocketing. We can’t even wait for a video to load—how can we possibly wait for the natural course of life to unfold? And this impatience takes a real toll on our bodies, too. (me included)

• In difficult moments, people (especially young people) are making impulsive, sometimes irreversible decisions—because sitting with pain long enough to process it feels unbearable.

• We don’t have the patience to sit through an entire movie or a boring (but necessary) class.

• We skim the surface of a million topics but rarely take the time to truly understand or deeply engage with any of them.

We’ve shortened our time for processing, understanding, learning, and mastering things.

And why am I bringing this up? Because awareness is the first step to change. And I’ve recently became aware of how impatient I am with the processes of life.

Think about the last situation that really troubled you. Did you give it time? Did you let yourself process it fully?

• The timeline of things doesn’t run on our schedule. It’s not just about our preferred pace—it’s also about the pace of others and, sometimes, just the natural timing of life itself.

We can’t skip steps, and often, trying to do so only creates more problems in the long run. I truly believe that patience is one of the most underrated virtues right now. There’s a time to observe, a time to process, and only then a time to conclude.

This applies to everything—from the simplest annoyances to the most overwhelming challenges. And maybe, just maybe, learning to take a deep breathe and let things flow in their natural time could start making all the difference.

With love,

M.